Chapter 3 On The Canine Wavelength021


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“Tom is working on bone composites for limbs and risers. We’ve received some interesting llama bone for the first time. It’s not as brittle as the others. Jerry has been shaping and polishing some of that to make new slimline arrow heads like these ones.”

“My personal pet project is the multi dimensional clockwork engine. These small bits here are the graceful cantilever springs, dampening the interference between each individual motor.”

“They don’t look like springs at all,” says CandiCrush, “they look like teaspoon handles!”

“Springs don’t have to be coiled,” replies BarmyWaffle, “think of the leaf springs attached to the axle of a wagon.”

Walker is more concerned with the task in hand, “have Tom and Jerry had things stolen?”

“Yes! Jerry was the first one to notice. Unintentionally he left a batch of six bone arrow heads on the bench one night. The next morning there were just five. It could be a counting error though. The remaining bits of the femur had been locked away, but he couldn’t be sure how much of it had been cut and turned into tips. His work diary says he made six that day, and he’s usually right. It’s a minor thing though, it’s not like he left six swords on his bench and lost a sword!”

TedTalker suggests, “do it again tonight. Deliberately leave six of those on the bench. Tomorrow we’ll check if they’re all still there. I’ll work the early shift tomorrow, so that I can keep an eye on things. Tolstoy might complain, but we’ll get more time off later.”

“Can I join you? What time?” asks KristalClear.

“Early shift starts at 06:00 so you’d have to be here at 05:45 for parade. If your parents are happy with that?”

“I’m sixteen now!” she says indignantly, thinking that sixteen is old enough to be making these decisions.

“But you said parade? You parade at 05:45?”

“Parade is a pre work briefing in the picquet post, that’s all. Not the sort of parade you’re thinking of. There’s no marching or shouting involved!”


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Chapter 3 On The Canine Wavelength020


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it has a shallow pitched roof which slopes just enough to handle the monsoon rains.

Coated with a light covering of tan creosote, the hut looks exactly the same as the other buildings. All of them have doors and windows fitted with heavy duty, secure wire mesh on the inside.

What’s different about the Innovation Lab is that the secure wire mesh is everywhere, even where it can’t be seen. It runs inside the centre of the double skinned walls, within the double skinned floor, and throughout the double skinned roof. If the building had no wood or glass, then it would look like a giant Faraday cage.

The interior of the lab resembles a weird type of classroom or workshop. One set up for a mix of woodwork and metalwork, though with an occasional ordinary desk. The unmistakeable smell of creosote on the outside gives way internally to a smell of silicon carbide from the angle grinder discs, mingling with a fainter smell of light machine oil.

The store room at the far end looks like a wire prison cell, or a smaller Faraday cage inside the larger Faraday cage. Across the back wall there are metal cabinets with heavy duty locks, and there’s one enormous cast iron safe. It’s neither a sheriff’s office nor a wild west bank, but it would look completely at home in a Western. The only bit that looks obviously scientific is the fume cupboard.

“This place is totally secure,” says BarmyWaffle, “and we operate a clear desk policy. At the end of every working day all the valuables are locked away. My own workbench, like all the others is cleared. The tools are cleaned and put back in the cabinets. My desk is cleared, and the only things left out are small items like my stapler, pencil sharpener, and rubber. I’ve lost four pencil sharpeners this year. No idea why!”

The two technicians pause to watch the visitors. They recognise all of them, though they only know KristalClear as the stable hand. BarmyWaffle introduces them, and then points towards a crossbow on the workbench as he explains more.


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Chapter 3 On The Canine Wavelength019


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of wild food beyond the perimeter. They don’t need to break into places to nick our hardware!”

“Besides,” says Walker, “there’s no evidence of any holes in the building.”

TedTalker adds, “we know that the foxes can dig under the perimeter fence occasionally, but the only time they go anywhere near a building is when the back door of the kitchen is open. They know there’s food in there.”

The smile on CandiCrush’s face vanishes as quickly as it appeared. KristalClear turns to Tolstoy again.

« I’ve never talked to a fox. They’re canines aren’t they? Have you ever talked to one? »

« Never! They might be canines, but they’re odd. They have retractable claws just like felines. They’re omnivores like rodents. And they always bark like they’ve just sat down on a drawing pin! They’re not proper canines. »

« When do you see them on site? »

« Just after sunrise. Usually. »

« 06:00. »

« Oh six what? »

« Sorry, human speak, just a mo … »

Scanning everybody, making eye contact with each one of them in turn, and then turning her attention to the military policeman, KristalClear says, “Ted, I need to talk to one of the foxes!”

She bends down, strokes Tolstoy’s head, and gives him a warm cuddle.

« See you later Tolstoy! »

« See you later Pretty! »

Having watched them approach, BarmyWaffle opens the door of the lab and invites them in. Tolstoy stays outside by his bowl of water.

Like all of the wooden huts in this part of the Garrison, the Innovation Lab sits slightly elevated on short supports above the dry, sandy ground. It’s functional and austere, built purely for practicality rather than comfort. Twice as long as it is wide,


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Chapter 3 On The Canine Wavelength018


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out this building. It looks the same as all the others. And this is the only building that’s being raided, and it’s always small bits of kit! Weird!”

CandiCrush comments, “it can’t be an outsider either! They know even less about the Garrison than the locals. And anybody who spends time doing a recce would have been detected by the dogs.”

KristalClear tunes in on the wavelength again.

« Tolstoy, what have you seen? »

« Extra work with no extra rewards! »

« No, I mean unusual activity. You, or Milton, or Dickens. Have none of you seen anything strange? »

« We’ve seen extra work all round and less play! I’ll ask them though, you can ask them yourself when you get the chance. »

« You mean no humans with odd behaviour? »

« They march up and down a lot on the parade square! And then they end up back where they started! That’s not odd, that’s stupid! »

« And what other animals do you see? »

« Horses, goats and chickens of course. They live here! Some birds come and go. Some rabbits can get through the fences, and sometimes foxes too. Although, I don’t see foxes very often. »

« Foxes? When was the last time you saw a fox? »

« This morning. Happens every day now. Never used to! »

« Just a second …  »

“Tolstoy says he’s seen more fox activity lately. Could it be them?”

Everybody looks at KristalClear, then at Tolstoy, and then at KristalClear again. CandiCrush begins to smile, and as she thinks more about it, her smile grows bigger. Constable Walker doesn’t know what to think, although TedTalker is already doubting the theory.

He strikes it down with, “how would they get into the lab? And what would they want bone for anyway? There’s plenty


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Chapter 3 On The Canine Wavelength017


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Chapter 3

On The Canine Wavelength

« Hello Tolstoy! »

« Hello Pretty! »

After many interactions with the pretty, young girl who comes to visit sometimes, Tolstoy has worked out that his name is Tolstoy. Although, he still can’t figure out the naming convention which the humans use for themselves. Because none of the other humans talk to him!

Yes, they might vocalise sounds, but that’s not the same thing as being on the wavelength. Only KristalClear can do that. And she’s pretty! So in effect that’s her name when she’s communicating on the canine wavelength.

« How are things? »

« My handler’s been a bit hyperactive lately. »

« Why? What’s up? »

« No idea! He’s been going around talking to all the humans. He keeps going in and out of that big kennel over there. »

Tolstoy looks directly at the Innovation Lab.

KristalClear looks at Constable Walker, “what do we know?”

“Nothing. And if we did know something, we couldn’t share it with you anyway! Ted has been round almost all the personnel, and there’s not a single lead to go on. They’re all squeaky clean.”

TedTalker chips in, “that’s no surprise really, everyone who works here, military, civilian, even part timers like you Kristal, they’ve all been vetted. The Garrison is vital to the stability of Wolfland. Everybody on site is sound.”

Constable Walker ponders, “well if it’s not an inside job, then who else would be able to get into the lab, and leave again, undetected? You said there’s always two staff who cross check the windows and doors are left securely locked each night?”

TedTalker continues, “we’re all baffled! It can’t be one of the locals, none of them know enough about the lab to single


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Chapter 2 Charming or Tedious015


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We may no longer have aerospace nor rail locomotive industries, but we still have shipbuilding and power stations. And Wolfland maintains its reputation for developing some really bright engineers, like BarmyWaffle.

“BarmyWaffle!” exclaims NutJob, “he gets a mention! How did he do that?”

“That was thirty years ago, long before you were born,” says Faraday, “back then he and I were working together on the Leven Dam Project.”

“After Wolfie Windy Water built the hydro electric power station we all moved back to Lancaster. It was then that I met Franklin and I started here at the PrintWorks. Barmy got a job at the Garrison. He was always much more into fine detail than big projects, and he led the development of a new technique for improving crossbows. He used animal bone to build a composite bow. Composites of composites if I remember correctly, though you’ll have to ask him about that!”

“I’m good with copper wire. Motors and dynamos are my thing, that’s why they call me Faraday!”

“And Franklin? Why is Bennie called Franklin?”

“Benjamin Franklin. He ran a newspaper. And Benita Scott runs this newspaper. When she was promoted to editor, the other journalists nicknamed her Franklin.”

“Anyway, side project time,” says Faraday, “we need to look at those needle roller bearings again. Fine detail stuff, I need somebody like you or Barmy to do that. I don’t have dainty, agile fingers like you!”


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Chapter 2 Charming or Tedious014


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cared for. Together they walk along the wall, looking at each newspaper cutting in turn.

“Here it is.”

Bite Size History – The BBC

Before The Decimation in 2162AD there was a social enterprise called The British Broadcasting Corporation (The BBC) which transmitted news and light entertainment across the airwaves via a mix of radio and television. In its final stages it also maintained a variety of websites on the internet. That all imploded when the oil and gas ran out, and when electricity supplies became unreliable.

A social enterprise was a special type of business which was required to reinvest its profits in furthering its own aims. That meant that there were no shareholders demanding a return on investment. The BBC needed to make just enough money to keep itself going as a business.

Some of the presenters and journalists became household names, though the real unsung heroes were the ones who worked behind the scenes. The organisation relied on expert technicians in telecoms, electronics, and computer software.

Back in the mists of time, the BBC adopted a Wednesday Afternoon Side Project culture. The techies at The BBC were allowed one afternoon per week, during working hours, to concentrate on their own personal side projects. The ethos was “go out and do some good in the world”.

By encouraging hundreds of fanciful yet worthy projects, the expectation was that one or two of them would actually succeed and really make a difference.

That’s how iPlayer started.

The BBC is the reason that in Wolfland, many businesses and schools still devote Wednesday afternoons to Side Project time. It’s a proud tradition based on hundreds of years of engineering heritage.

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Chapter 2 Charming or Tedious013


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Libraries have tried to retain as much printed material as they can. However, technical manuals were previously held only by the businesses that wanted them, usually as PDFs!

—o—

“I thought you were meeting BarmyWaffle today?” says Franklin.

Both Franklin and Faraday are a little surprised when NutJob turns up at the PrintWorks for side project time.

“It’s complicated! He was in a rush, we had a thirty second chat and we’re going to meet properly next week.”

Bennie and Michael Scott, better known as Franklin and Faraday, run The Lancastrian. They’d like to retire soon, but they’re passionate about delivering the news. Franklin started work at the newspaper as a fifteen year old trainee journalist.

She travelled a lot, learnt all the languages in and around the Irish Sea, and has become extremely popular, and well respected. And knowledgeable!

An outgoing, bubbly lady, she has lots of friends.

Faraday is much more introverted, an electrical and mechanical engineer by trade, he has been able to maintain the twenty second century printing presses in working order much longer than the manufacturer’s guidelines. Nobody makes these printing presses any more.

Building on the engineering heritage of Wolfland, Faraday wants to build his own sustainable presses and he needs a bit of help. He’s almost fifty years older than NutJob, and in spite of that, the two of them get along incredibly well!

“Side project?” asks NutJob inquisitively, “where did this Wednesday Side Project idea come from?”

“It’s a long standing tradition you know,” says Faraday, “Franklin did some research on it a while back,  and wrote up a Bite Size History report, it’s up on the Archive Wall somewhere.”

Along the wall down one side of the PrintWorks there’s a collection of framed articles. A little faded in places, but well


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Chapter 2 Charming or Tedious012


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“It’s hard to say,” responds TedTalker, “the boffins keep inventories of all their weapons, crossbows, swords, bows and arrows, that sort of thing, but the lab doesn’t log every single small component. And it’s the small things that disappear.”

“Like what?”

“Let’s ask Barmy, he can explain it better than me.”

“We know we’ve lost some prototype arrow heads,” says BarmyWaffle, “some bolt tips, and some samples of bone. The Lab recently received a consignment of llama bone to experiment with. We want to see if it’s more resilient than sheep or goat.”

“Anything explosive? Anything electric?”

“The chemicals are under double lock and key. Nothing wrong there. Our battery technology programme is on hold. It’s like we’re back where it all started in the 1800s. Wet acid batteries and not much else. We have a little material for dry batteries but we’re too focussed on weaponry right now.”

“And other types of power plants?”

“The prototype drones have multi level rubber bands, or multi dimensional clockwork engines. And that stuff is all big and bulky.”

“Oh, I should introduce you to NutJob,” says Walker, “not only is he into model aircraft, he’s working with Faraday on building a portable electricity generator.”

“Yes I met him earlier, for all of sixty seconds, but you can’t put wind turbines or hydro electric plants inside aircraft! Let me show you the size of some of these enormous rubber bands and clockwork engines. And in any case, the drones are pretty useless. We’d need to build a radio control system first.”

“That’ll mean electronics,” says Walker, “transistors and stuff? Things that went out with The Decimation?”

“Exactly,” says BarmyWaffle, “we’ve not had transistors for 300 years, or thermionic valves, and that’s a 400 year old technology. We can’t manufacture any of it. We have no blueprints. We can’t even find reference material for radios, nor books on transistors or valves. It was all on computers in those days, and we know what happened to computers!”


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Chapter 2 Charming or Tedious011


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A bit of everyday intuition about other humans is fine, but actually reading their minds? That could be a burden as much as a blessing! Emphasising that her psychic powers only work with animals, KristalClear prefers to describe herself as being demi-psychic.

“When we get to the Lab,” says CandiCrush, “I want you to be on the look out for any signals. Even if you can’t do humans you might pick up on something subtle that the rest of us have missed.”

“Or perhaps one of the dogs will let you know if they’ve spotted something?”

—o—

Constable Walker is already at the Lab, chatting with her Garrison counterpart TedTalker.

Walker is a bright, cheerful, attractive young lady in her mid twenties, and she wears the customary police summer uniform all year round. The badge on her peaked cap has an impression of a silver wolf symbolising the Wolfland Constabulary. At 23 years of age, TedTalker resembles the smart character on the recruitment posters. He’s the archetypal British Military Police officer with a red peaked cap, bearing the same silver wolf badge.

“Inside job is what they’re saying,” says TedTalker, “but whoever it is, is cleverly masking their activity. We’ve not detected any misuse of keys, nor anything strange about the doors or windows.”

“It can’t be the lab staff themselves?” asks Walker.

“Never in a million years! All the civilian staff in the Garrison are high calibre. Everybody has security clearance. And it’s not Captain Thomson nor Commander Crush either, they’re the only other people who know how the Lab works.”

“And no other possible leads?” asks Walker, “nobody with a grudge or a grievance?”

“Zilch!”

“What do we know actually went missing?”


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